Motherhood

What I Didn’t Expect When I Had My Second Child

-POP

I feel like I’m playing a never ending game of 52 card pickup, except the dealer is a crazy little two-year-old and the cards are colorful blocks, toy vehicles and cracker crumbs.

I didn’t expect my house to become even more messy with the addition of just a tiny newborn, but somehow it has. Everything is a mess. All of the time.


My life is now a constant battle between whether I should hold Wallace in my arms, or if I should set Wally down and play a game with Russell.

I didn’t expect balancing my attention between two children, plus trying to find time for me would be so difficult. I also didn’t expect to feel so guilty when one of my boys didn’t have my full attention. 

Each time I pick up Wally to feed him or just hold him, Russell lifts up his arms to me and says with the saddest toddler voice, “hold.” It breaks my heart because It’s not as simple as just picking him up anymore. As time goes on I’m figuring out how to manage my time  with two babes. I think this part is going to get easier.


This time around, my greatest fear about giving birth was the time it would take my body to heal because I had a difficult time when Russell was born. It was a miserable experience for me.

I didn’t expect to heal this quickly. I feel thankful for the strength my body has had after the strain it just underwent.


Corde and I have had a lot of help from our mothers and we have had a few visitors who came to meet Wally. I surprisingly haven’t enjoyed having visitors as much as I would have hoped. (although, I’m deeply grateful for all of the service and love we have received!)

I didn’t expect to not want anyone (Not even family) to hold or be around Wallace, or “get their germs on him for the first week(ish).” It’s dumb, I know, but I have felt extremely protective this time around. I don’t remember feeling this way with Russell, but I also didn’t have as many visitors when he was born.


I didn’t expect breastfeeding to come so naturally and painlessly the second time. I also expected it to be more painful but it hasn’t been bad at all. (Aside from getting mastitis)

The first time I breastfed, it was weird and completely awkward. It took me a while to feel comfortable doing it and man, did it hurt! I was going to give up just a few days into it but my mom convinced me not to. With Wally it has been a million times easier.


I knew that when Wally was born I’d love him immensely, but I didn’t expect my love to grow so dramatically towards Russell the moment Wallace was born as well. Seeing them together and knowing they are both my children, and that they will be best friends, is such a sweet thing for me.


I also didn’t expect to come home to a son who appeared to have doubled in size in only 1 night.

Seriously, Russell looks ginormous now. I remember one of the nurses in the hospital telling me this would happen. She was absolutely correct!


I didn’t expect to function so well on limited sleep. Apparently after having your first child, your body accepts that sleep isn’t a thing anymore and life is still doable without it.

I’m a mombie. A mom zombie.


I didn’t expect to feel THIS happy. I think having children instills a sense of pride in a person. A lot of my happiness comes from seeing the two little beauties that I created. I didn’t know that being a mom of two would feel this good.

Don’t get me wrong, I probably don’t always appear to be this happy. I am a total grump these days considering the amount of sleep I get each night, but deep down I am so happy with my life.


I didn’t expect Russell to be so loving towards his baby brother right away. I’ve been impressed by the kindness Russ has shown to Wally already. I expected him to be somewhat spiteful towards Wallace because of jealousy. Instead, he constantly wants to hold, kiss, hug and tickle Wally. Russ tries to share his food with him, feed him a bottle and more. I can’t wait to watch them become best friends.


We are so thankful that Wallace came into our lives.

Having a second son has been a better experience than I originally thought up in my head. It has been challenging and emotionally exhausting, of course, but so much light has entered into my husband and I’s world. It’s certainly a massive adjustment for all of us. We are figuring it out as we go.

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